Stephen Lynch 3 Balloons (album) guitar tab

 
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3 Balloons (album) by Stephen Lynch xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx 3 B a l l o o n s ( 2 0 0 9 ) T h e U n o f f i c i a l O n l i n e G u i t a r C h o r d s D R A K E B E L L xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx +--------------------------PLEASE NOTE--------------------------+ + This file is the work of Jordan Lapping and represents his + + transcription of the album. You may only use this file for + + private study, scholarship, or research. The contents may not + + be duplicated for use with other websites without written + + permission. Thank you for understanding. Enjoy. + +---------------------------------------------------------------+ ARTIST: Stephen Lynch ALBUM: 3 Balloons (2009) GERNE: Comedy SONGS: 1. Waiting 2. Fishin' Hole 3. Dear Diary 1 4. Crazy Peanuts 5. 3 Balloons 6. Dear Diary 2 7. Medieval Bush 8. A History Lesson 9. Dear Diary 3 10. You (Prettier Than) 11. The Ballad of Scarface 12. America 13. Dear Diary 4 14. Hallelujah 15. [BONUS] Newer Dear Diary Entires xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx H o w T o R e a d T h i s G u i d e xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx When reading online chords, certain questions may often spring to mind, such as: "How many strums do I do here?" or "What is the pattern there, when should I switch chord?" Similarly, with online tabs they aren't often very accurate; or don't show clearly how this is synchronized to the lyrics of the track. This can be a pain for those learning, and I myself have suffered from it before. To eliminate this problem, I've tried my very best to show both chords and tabs for each song. Take, for example, this randomly put-together riff: ========================================================= D C G E Em e]--22222--00000--33333~----------0~~~----0--------0~~~--| B]--33333--11111--00000~---------0~~~---0---------0~~~---| G]--22222--00000--00000~--------1~~~--------0----0~~~----| D]--00000--22222--00000~-------2~~~-------------2~~~-----| A]---------33333--22222~------2~~~-------------2~~~------| E]----------------33333~-----0~~~-------------0~~~-------| D C La la la la la, da da da da da G E Em La la la la la, daa..... ========================================================= In this way, the above indicates how many times the chord is strummed, and the "lyrics" below indicate when the chord is changed. Similarly, you can see that the E is written differently to the former, which indicates a slow, singular strum (then letting it ring). Finally, the Em tabbed at the end shows a short picked chord followed by another slow, singular strum (again letting it ring). Thus, the reader should be able to sufficiently and successfully identify how to fit the given information together. This now hopefully leaves no stone unturned, and enables you all to understand how to read this guide. With this said, it may be useful for you to understand the following techniques used in this guide: TABLATURE LEGEND: (h) = hammer-on (p) = pull-off (/) = slide (~) = let it ring (x) = muted strings N/C = No Chord xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx 1. W a i t i n g xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Tabbed by Jordan Lapping Tuning: E (Standard) CHORDS USED: A Am7 Asus4 B7 C Cmaj7 D E Em e]---0----0----0----x----0----x----2----0----0---| B]---2----1----3----0----1----0----3----0----0---| G]---2----0----2----2----0----0----2----1----0---| D]---2----2----2----1----2----2----0----2----2---| A]---0----0----0----2----3----3---------2----2---| E]----------------------------3---------0----0---| INTRO: Em e]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--| B]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--| G]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--| D]--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22--| (x4) A]--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22--| E]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--| VERSE 1: Em Cmaj7 e]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-xx-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-xx--| B]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--| G]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--| D]--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22--| A]--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22--3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-33-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-33--| E]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-33-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-33--| Am7 B7 e]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x----| B]--1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1-11-1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1-11--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0~~--| G]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2~~--| D]--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22--1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1~~--| A]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2~~--| E]--------------------------------------------------------------| Em Cmaj7 Itís out of my hands and all I can do it wait Am7 Itís the not knowing that has put me in this state B7 The minutes feel like hours, the tension is too great Iíve done my part so now itís in the hands of fate... CHORUS 1: Em C D B7 e]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22--x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-xx--| B]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1-11--3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-33--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--| G]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22--| D]--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1-11--| (x2) A]--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22--3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-33----------------------2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22--| E]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--------------------------------------------------------------| Em C Waiting for my AIDS test to come back D B7 I shouldnít have fucked that prostitute without a prophylactic Em C Waiting for my AIDS test to come back D B7 Regret is dripping from me like my semen down her crack Em And now I waitÖ TRANSITION 1: Em e]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--| B]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--| G]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--| D]--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22--| (x4) A]--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22--| E]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--| VERSE 2: Em Cmaj7 e]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-xx-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-xx--| B]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--| G]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--| D]--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22--| A]--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22--3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-33-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-33--| E]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-33-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-33--| Am7 B7 e]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-xx-x--| B]--1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1-11-1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1-11--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00-0--| G]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22-2--| D]--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22--1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1-11-1--| A]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22-2--| E]---------------------------------------------------------------| Em Cmaj7 My nerves - they have been frayed, my pants - they have been shat Am7 I know the nurse will say, ďItís time to have a chatĒ B7 At least Iíll never worry about getting fat N/C I should think positive Ė no, wait! I didnít say that! CHORUS 2: Em C D B7 e]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22--x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-xx--| B]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1-11--3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-33--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--| G]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22--| D]--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1-11--| (x2) A]--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22--3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-33----------------------2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22--| E]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--------------------------------------------------------------| Em C Waiting for my AIDS test to come back D B7 I never should have blown the tranny in my Cadillac Em C Waiting for my AIDS test to come back D B7 I just had to taste that sweet, forbidden nectar from his sack Em And now I waitÖ TRANSITION 2: Em e]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--| B]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--| G]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--| D]--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22--| (x4) A]--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22--| E]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--| VERSE 3: Em Cmaj7 e]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-xx-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-xx--| B]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--| G]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--| D]--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22--| A]--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22--3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-33-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-33--| E]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-33-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-33--| Am7 B7 e]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--x--| B]--1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1-11-1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1-11--0--| G]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--2--| D]--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22--1--| A]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--2--| E]--------------------------------------------| Em Cmaj7 Is it over, will my jersey be retired? Am7 Will my name stitched upon a quilt be required? B7 Did I make a difference, was my life inspired? N/C Will Denzel Washington defend me when Iím fired? CHORUS 3: Em C D B7 e]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22--x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-xx--| B]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1-11--3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-33--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--| G]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22--| D]--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1-11--| (x2) A]--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22--3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-33----------------------2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22--| E]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--------------------------------------------------------------| Em C Waiting for my AIDS test to come back D B7 Eating assholes shouldnít be an aphrodisiac Em C Waiting for my AIDS test to come back D B7 Em If Iím clean I swear to God I will stop shooting smack... probably PRE-BRIDGE: Em A Asus4 A e]--0-00000-0000--0-0000-0-0000-0--| B]--0-00000-0000--2-2222h3-3333p2--| G]--0-00000-0000--2-2222-2-2222-2--| D]--2-22222-2222--2-2222-2-2222-2--| (x2) A]--2-22222-2222--0-0000-0-0000-0--| E]--0-00000-0000-------------------| BRIDGE: Em A Asus4 A e]--0-00000-0000--0-0000-0-0000-0--| B]--0-00000-0000--2-2222h3-3333p2--| G]--0-00000-0000--2-2222-2-2222-2--| D]--2-22222-2222--2-2222-2-2222-2--| (x12) A]--2-22222-2222--0-0000-0-0000-0--| E]--0-00000-0000-------------------| Em A Asus4 A Boys and girls, don't be naÔve Em A Asus4 A Take it from your Uncle Steve Em A Asus4 A AIDS cares not whom it affects Em A Asus4 A Caught from unprotected sex Em A Asus4 A Sharing needles, blood or spit Em A Asus4 A Or piss or semen, even shit Em A Asus4 A From handshakes, sneezes, toilet seats Em A Asus4 A From 'monkey bites' and uncooked meats Em A Asus4 A From dirty coins and dreadlocked hair Em A Asus4 A From certain children in daycare Em A Asus4 A Drinking water, breathing air Em A Asus4 A I tell you, AIDS is everywhere PRE-OUTRO: C D e]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22--| B]--1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1-11--3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-33--| G]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22--| D]--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--| (x2) A]--3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-33----------------------| E]------------------------------------------| C D C D e]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22------0~~~-----2~~~--| B]--1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1-11--3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-33-----1~~~-----3~~~---| G]--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22----0~~~-----2~~~----| D]--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-22--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00---2~~~-----0~~~-----| A]--3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-33----------------------3~~~---------------| E]-------------------------------------------------------------| C D Oh God! I can't take anymore C D I think I'll run right out that door C D But wait - the nurse comes straightaway C D Tell me, what does my test say...? OUTRO: E D e]--0--0-0-0-0--0-0-0-0--0-0-0--2-2--| B]--0--0-0-0-0--0-0-0-0--0-0-0--3-3--| G]--1--1-1-1-1--1-1-1-1--1-1-1--2-2--| D]--2--2-2-2-2--2-2-2-2--2-2-2--0-0--| A]--2--2-2-2-2--2-2-2-2--2-2-2-------| E]--0--0-0-0-0--0-0-0-0--0-0-0-------| E D E e]--0--0-0-0-0--0-0-0-0--0-0-0--2-2--0-0-0~~~--| B]--0--0-0-0-0--0-0-0-0--0-0-0--3-3--0-0-0~~~--| G]--1--1-1-1-1--1-1-1-1--1-1-1--2-2--1-1-1~~~--| D]--2--2-2-2-2--2-2-2-2--2-2-2--0-0--2-2-2~~~--| A]--2--2-2-2-2--2-2-2-2--2-2-2-------2-2-2~~~--| E]--0--0-0-0-0--0-0-0-0--0-0-0-------0-0-0~~~--| E D E Iím okay! Iím okay! D E Itís just chlamydia... xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx 2. F i s h i n ' H o l e xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Tabbed by Jordan Lapping Tuning: E (Standard) CHORDS USED: A A7 B7 C D E G e]---0----0----x----0----2----0----3---| B]---2----2----0----1----3----0----3---| G]---2----0----2----0----2----1----0---| D]---2----2----1----2----0----2----0---| A]---0----0----2----3---------2----2---| E]----------------------------0----3---| VERSE 1: G A7 C G e]--3-333-33333--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--3-333-33333--| B]--3-333-33333--2-222-22222--1-111-11111--0-000-00000--| G]--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--| D]--0-000-00000--2-222-22222--2-222-22222--0-000-00000--| A]--2-222-22222--0-000-00000--3-333-33333--2-222-22222--| E]--3-333-33333----------------------------3-333-33333--| G A7 C D e]--3-333-33333--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--3-333-33333--| B]--0-000-00000--2-222-22222--1-111-11111--2-222-22222--| G]--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--3-333-33333--| D]--0-000-00000--2-222-22222--2-222-22222--0-000-00000--| A]--2-222-22222--0-000-00000--3-333-33333---------------| E]--3-333-33333-----------------------------------------| G A7 Wanted to have some quality time with my son C G So I brought him down to the fishin' hole G A7 He didn't like the feelin' of that worm in his hand C D Got mad - threw down his fishin' pole VERSE 2: G A7 C G e]--3-333-33333--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--3-333-33333--| B]--3-333-33333--2-222-22222--1-111-11111--0-000-00000--| G]--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--| D]--0-000-00000--2-222-22222--2-222-22222--0-000-00000--| A]--2-222-22222--0-000-00000--3-333-33333--2-222-22222--| E]--3-333-33333----------------------------3-333-33333--| G A7 C D e]--3-333-33333--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--3-333-33333--| B]--0-000-00000--2-222-22222--1-111-11111--2-222-22222--| G]--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--3-333-33333--| D]--0-000-00000--2-222-22222--2-222-22222--0-000-00000--| A]--2-222-22222--0-000-00000--3-333-33333---------------| E]--3-333-33333-----------------------------------------| G A7 I said, "That's alright, son. Let's go and get an ice cream" C G "Let your old man buy you a treat" G A7 But he didn't like no flavours up upon that wall C D Started crying, and ran into the street... CHORUS 1: G B7 C G e]--3-333-33333--x-xxx-22222--0-000-00000--3-333-33333--| B]--3-333-33333--0-000-00000--1-111-11111--0-000-00000--| G]--0-000-00000--2-222-22222--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--| D]--0-000-00000--1-111-11111--2-222-22222--0-000-00000--| (x2) A]--2-222-22222--2-222-22222--3-333-33333--2-222-22222--| E]--3-333-33333----------------------------3-333-33333--| G B7 He's an asshole, my kid's an asshole C G I swear he just don't float my boat G B7 Always crying, always crying C G Make me wanna punch him in his little throat VERSE 3: G A7 C G e]--3-333-33333--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--3-333-33333--| B]--3-333-33333--2-222-22222--1-111-11111--0-000-00000--| G]--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--| D]--0-000-00000--2-222-22222--2-222-22222--0-000-00000--| A]--2-222-22222--0-000-00000--3-333-33333--2-222-22222--| E]--3-333-33333----------------------------3-333-33333--| G A7 C D e]--3-333-33333--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--3-333-33333--| B]--0-000-00000--2-222-22222--1-111-11111--2-222-22222--| G]--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--3-333-33333--| D]--0-000-00000--2-222-22222--2-222-22222--0-000-00000--| A]--2-222-22222--0-000-00000--3-333-33333---------------| E]--3-333-33333-----------------------------------------| G A7 I called my lady up to tell her what had happened C G How our son had run away G A7 She said, "Don't worry, baby. I will talk to him" C D "And everything will be okay" CHORUS 2: G B7 C G e]--3-333-33333--x-xxx-xxxxx--0-000-00000--3-333-33333--| B]--3-333-33333--0-000-00000--1-111-11111--0-000-00000--| G]--0-000-00000--2-222-22222--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--| D]--0-000-00000--1-111-11111--2-222-22222--0-000-00000--| (x2) A]--2-222-22222--2-222-22222--3-333-33333--2-222-22222--| E]--3-333-33333----------------------------3-333-33333--| G B7 My lady's an asshole, she's an asshole C G Her assholishness is off the charts G B7 Always perfect, always perfect C G Make me wanna punch her in her lady-parts PRE-VERSE: G A7 C D e]--3-333-33333--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--3-333-33333--| B]--0-000-00000--2-222-22222--1-111-11111--2-222-22222--| G]--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--3-333-33333--| D]--0-000-00000--2-222-22222--2-222-22222--0-000-00000--| A]--2-222-22222--0-000-00000--3-333-33333---------------| E]--3-333-33333-----------------------------------------| VERSE 4: G A7 C G e]--3-333-33333--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--3-333-33333--| B]--3-333-33333--2-222-22222--1-111-11111--0-000-00000--| G]--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--| D]--0-000-00000--2-222-22222--2-222-22222--0-000-00000--| A]--2-222-22222--0-000-00000--3-333-33333--2-222-22222--| E]--3-333-33333----------------------------3-333-33333--| G A7 C D e]--3-333-33333--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--3-333-33333--| B]--0-000-00000--2-222-22222--1-111-11111--2-222-22222--| G]--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--3-333-33333--| D]--0-000-00000--2-222-22222--2-222-22222--0-000-00000--| A]--2-222-22222--0-000-00000--3-333-33333---------------| E]--3-333-33333-----------------------------------------| G A7 I decided I'd go down to the bar C G And drown my sorrows in a beer G A7 But the sign outside said 'Closed For Renovations' C D 'We'll open up again next year'... CHORUS 3: G B7 C G e]--3-333-33333--x-xxx-xxxxx--0-000-00000--3-333-33333--| B]--3-333-33333--0-000-00000--1-111-11111--0-000-00000--| G]--0-000-00000--2-222-22222--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--| D]--0-000-00000--1-111-11111--2-222-22222--0-000-00000--| (x2) A]--2-222-22222--2-222-22222--3-333-33333--2-222-22222--| E]--3-333-33333----------------------------3-333-33333--| G B7 That bar is an asshole, it's an asshole C G Oh, the worst bar in the land G B7 Always closing, always closing C G Can't punch a bar, 'cause you'll hurt your hand PRE-VERSE: G A7 C D e]--3-333-33333--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--3-333-33333--| B]--0-000-00000--2-222-22222--1-111-11111--2-222-22222--| G]--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--3-333-33333--| D]--0-000-00000--2-222-22222--2-222-22222--0-000-00000--| A]--2-222-22222--0-000-00000--3-333-33333---------------| E]--3-333-33333-----------------------------------------| VERSE 5: G A7 C G e]--3-333-33333--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--3-333-33333--| B]--3-333-33333--2-222-22222--1-111-11111--0-000-00000--| G]--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--| D]--0-000-00000--2-222-22222--2-222-22222--0-000-00000--| A]--2-222-22222--0-000-00000--3-333-33333--2-222-22222--| E]--3-333-33333----------------------------3-333-33333--| G A7 C D e]--3-333-33333--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--3-333-33333--| B]--0-000-00000--2-222-22222--1-111-11111--2-222-22222--| G]--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--3-333-33333--| D]--0-000-00000--2-222-22222--2-222-22222--0-000-00000--| A]--2-222-22222--0-000-00000--3-333-33333---------------| E]--3-333-33333-----------------------------------------| G A7 I went home to forget about my troubles C G Sat down in my favourite easy chair G A7 But I couldn't relax for the pain I was feeling C D As my hemorrhoid began to flair... CHORUS 4: G B7 C G e]--3-333-33333--x-xxx-xxxxx--0-000-00000--3-333-33333--| B]--3-333-33333--0-000-00000--1-111-11111--0-000-00000--| G]--0-000-00000--2-222-22222--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--| D]--0-000-00000--1-111-11111--2-222-22222--0-000-00000--| (x2) A]--2-222-22222--2-222-22222--3-333-33333--2-222-22222--| E]--3-333-33333----------------------------3-333-33333--| G B7 My asshole's an asshole, a real butthole C G Needs to put his asshole-self in check G B7 Always burning, always itching C G Make me wanna punch him in his asshole neck PRE-BRIDGE: G A7 C D e]--3-333-33333--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--3-333-33333--| B]--0-000-00000--2-222-22222--1-111-11111--2-222-22222--| G]--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--3-333-33333--| D]--0-000-00000--2-222-22222--2-222-22222--0-000-00000--| A]--2-222-22222--0-000-00000--3-333-33333---------------| E]--3-333-33333-----------------------------------------| BRIDGE: G A7 C G e]--3-333-33333--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--3-333-33333--| B]--3-333-33333--2-222-22222--1-111-11111--0-000-00000--| G]--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--| D]--0-000-00000--2-222-22222--2-222-22222--0-000-00000--| A]--2-222-22222--0-000-00000--3-333-33333--2-222-22222--| E]--3-333-33333----------------------------3-333-33333--| G A7 C D e]--3-333-33333--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--3-333-33333--| B]--0-000-00000--2-222-22222--1-111-11111--2-222-22222--| G]--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--3-333-33333--| D]--0-000-00000--2-222-22222--2-222-22222--0-000-00000--| A]--2-222-22222--0-000-00000--3-333-33333---------------| E]--3-333-33333-----------------------------------------| G A7 C G A7 C D e]--3-333-33333--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--3-333-33333--3~~------0~~------0~~------3~~~--| B]--3-333-33333--2-222-22222--1-111-11111--0-000-00000--0~~-----2~~------1~~------2~~~---| G]--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--0~~----0~~------0~~------3~~~----| D]--0-000-00000--2-222-22222--2-222-22222--0-000-00000--0~~---2~~------2~~------0~~~-----| A]--2-222-22222--0-000-00000--3-333-33333--2-222-22222--2~~--0~~------3~~----------------| E]--3-333-33333----------------------------3-333-33333--3~~------------------------------| G A7 Late one night, lying awake in bed C G Mmmm, a realization came G A7 Are there really assholes everywhere I look C D Or am I the one to blame? G A7 Maybe I just do not say the things I should say C G And I don't do the things I ought A7 So I took a good hard look at myself in the mirror C D And this is what I thought... CHORUS 5: G B7 C G e]--3-333-33333--x-xxx-xxxxx--0-000-00000--3-333-33333--| B]--3-333-33333--0-000-00000--1-111-11111--0-000-00000--| G]--0-000-00000--2-222-22222--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--| D]--0-000-00000--1-111-11111--2-222-22222--0-000-00000--| (x2) A]--2-222-22222--2-222-22222--3-333-33333--2-222-22222--| E]--3-333-33333----------------------------3-333-33333--| N/C The guy who sold me this mirror's G B7 An asshole, he's an asshole C G Son of a bitch said it was antique G B7 He was lying, he was lying C G Make me wanna punch him in his salesman cheek OUTRO: C G C G C G C G e]--0-000-00000--3-333-33333--0-000-00000--3-333-33333--0-000-00000--3-333-33333--0-000-00000--3--| B]--1-111-11111--0-000-00000--1-111-11111--0-000-00000--1-111-11111--0-000-00000--1-111-11111--0--| G]--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--0-000-00000--0--| D]--2-222-22222--0-000-00000--2-222-22222--0-000-00000--2-222-22222--0-000-00000--2-222-22222--0--| A]--3-333-33333--2-222-22222--3-333-33333--2-222-22222--3-333-33333--2-222-22222--3-333-33333--2--| E]---------------3-333-33333---------------3-333-33333---------------3-333-33333---------------3--| C G I'm on a real asshole streak C G I could open up an asshole bootique C G I think this song has reached its peak C G Goodbye, you asshole, see you next week xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx 3. D e a r D i a r y 1 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Tabbed by Jordan Lapping Tuning: E (Standard) CHORDS USED: Am C Cmaj9 Em F G e]---0----0----0----0----1----3---| B]---1----1----1----0----1----0---| G]---2----0----0----0----2----0---| D]---2----2----0----2----3----0---| A]---0----3----2----2----3----2---| E]------------------0----1----3---| INTRO: C Em e]--------------------------0~--------| B]------------------------0----0------| G]-----0-----0-----0----0--------0----| D]-------0h2---0h2-----------------2--| (x2) A]--3~--------------------------------| E]--------------------0---------------| VERSE: C Em e]--------0~-------------0~--------| B]------1----1---------0----0------| G]----0--------0-----0--------0----| D]---------------2--------------2--| (x4) A]--3------------------------------| E]-----------------0---------------| F G C Cmaj9 Am F G e]--------1~-------------3~-------|-------0--------0--------0~-------|-------1~----------3--| B]------1----1---------0----0-----|-----1--------1--------1----1-----|-----1----1--------0--| G]----2--------2-----0--------0---|---0--------0--------2--------2---|---2--------2------0--| D]---------------3--------------0-|--------------------------------2-|--------------3----0--| A]--------------------------------|-3--------2--------0--------------|-------------------2--| E]--1--------------3--------------|----------------------------------|-1---------------3-3--| C Em Dear Diary - today was a good day C Em Papa and I picked wild flowers C Em Mama joined and we lay in the sunshine C Em Then we sang and danced for hours F G I know tomorrow will be even better C Cmaj9 Am So the good Lord I thank F G I'll write more later. Love, N/C Anne Frank OUTRO: C Em C e]--------------------------0~------------0~~~--| B]------------------------0----0---------1~~~---| G]-----0-----0-----0----0--------0------0~~~----| D]-------0h2---0h2-----------------2---2~~~-----| A]--3~--------------------------------3~~~------| E]--------------------0-------------------------| xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx 4. C r a z y P e a n u t s xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Tabbed by Jordan Lapping Tuning: E (Standard) CHORDS USED: A5 C5 D5 E5 F5 G G5 e]---------------------------3-------| B]---------------------------0-------| G]-------5----7--------------0-------| D]--7----5----7----2----3----0----5--| A]--7----3----5----2----3----2----5--| E]--5--------------0----1----3----3--| INTRO: C5/D5 A5 C5 G5 e|------------------------------------------| B|------------------------------------------| G|--5/7-7--xxxx-------xxxx--5-5--xxxx-------| D|--5/7-7--xxxx--7-7--xxxx--5-5--xxxx--5-5--| (x2) A|--3/5-5--xxxx--7-7--xxxx--3-3--xxxx--5-5--| E|---------xxxx--5-5--xxxx-------xxxx--3-3--| VERSE 1: C5/D5 A5 C5 G5 e|------------------------------------------| B|------------------------------------------| G|--5/7-7--xxxx-------xxxx--5-5--xxxx-------| D|--5/7-7--xxxx--7-7--xxxx--5-5--xxxx--5-5--| (x4) A|--3/5-5--xxxx--7-7--xxxx--3-3--xxxx--5-5--| E|---------xxxx--5-5--xxxx-------xxxx--3-3--| F5 E5 G e|----------------------------3-3--| B|----------------------------0-0--| G|----------------------------0-0--| D|--3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3--2-2-2-2--0-0--| A|--3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3--2-2-2-2--2-2--| E|--1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1--0-0-0-0--3-3--| C5/D5 A5 C5 G5 C5/D5 Charlie Brown had a big blockhead, wore a stripey sweater every day A5 C5 G5 C5/D5 Tried to kick that football, but Lucy always pulled the motherfucker away A5 C5 G5 C5/D5 He flew a kite just to try to relax, but he always put that shit in a tree A5 C5 G5 And the little red-headed girl wouldn't give no play to poor Chuck B. F5 E5 G They were the baddest fuckers in the funny papers - PEANUTS! VERSE 2: C5/D5 A5 C5 G5 e|------------------------------------------| B|------------------------------------------| G|--5/7-7--xxxx-------xxxx--5-5--xxxx-------| D|--5/7-7--xxxx--7-7--xxxx--5-5--xxxx--5-5--| (x4) A|--3/5-5--xxxx--7-7--xxxx--3-3--xxxx--5-5--| E|---------xxxx--5-5--xxxx-------xxxx--3-3--| F5 E5 G e|----------------------------3-3--| B|----------------------------0-0--| G|----------------------------0-0--| D|--3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3--2-2-2-2--0-0--| A|--3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3--2-2-2-2--2-2--| E|--1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1--0-0-0-0--3-3--| C5/D5 A5 C5 G5 C5/D5 (Ah-oh) Onto a security blanket, Linus Van Pelt would latch (Ah-oh) A5 C5 G5 C5/D5 He snuggled into that bitch to keep warm while waiting in a pumpkin patch (Ah-oh) A5 C5 G5 C5/D5 Had a stalker named Sally Brown - well, she always tried to get her some (Ah-oh) A5 C5 G5 She loved the way he knew the meaning of Christmas and the sexy way he sucked that thumb F5 E5 G Well, watch out, 'cause here they come... PEANUTS! CHORUS 1: C5/D5 A5 C5 G5 D5 A5 C5 G5 e|-------------------------------|-------------------------------| B|-------------------------------|-------------------------------| G|--5/7-77----------5-55---------|-7-77----------5-55------------| D|--5/7-77--777777--5-55--555555-|-7-77--777777--5-55--555555----| A|--3/5-55--777777--3-33--555555-|-5-55--777777--3-33--555555----| E|----------555555--------333333-|-------555555-------333333-----| D5 A5 C5 G5 D5 A5 C5 G5 e|-----------------------------|----------------------------------------------------| B|-----------------------------|----------------------------------------------------| G|--7-77----------5-55---------|-7-77----------5-55---------------------------------| D|--7-77--777777--5-55--555555-|-7-77--777777--5-55--5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5--| A|--5-55--777777--3-33--555555-|-5-55--777777--3-33--5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5--| E|--------555555--------333333-|-------555555--------3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3--| C5/D5 A5 C5 G5 Oh Peanuts! Crazy Peanuts! D5 A5 C5 G5 A bunch of kids trying to be free D5 A5 C5 G5 Take my hand and let's dance now D5 A5 C5 G5 Under Charlie's shitty Christmas Tree VERSE 3: C5/D5 A5 C5 G5 e|------------------------------------------| B|------------------------------------------| G|--5/7-7--xxxx-------xxxx--5-5--xxxx-------| D|--5/7-7--xxxx--7-7--xxxx--5-5--xxxx--5-5--| (x4) A|--3/5-5--xxxx--7-7--xxxx--3-3--xxxx--5-5--| E|---------xxxx--5-5--xxxx-------xxxx--3-3--| F5 E5 G e|----------------------------3-3--| B|----------------------------0-0--| G|----------------------------0-0--| D|--3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3--2-2-2-2--0-0--| A|--3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3--2-2-2-2--2-2--| E|--1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1--0-0-0-0--3-3--| C5/D5 A5 C5 G5 C5/D5 (Ah-oh) Oh, Marcie was best friends with 'Patty', 'Patty Peppermint' (Ah-oh) A5 C5 G5 C5/D5 She would love to do things to that girl that Charles M. Schulz can't print (Ah-oh) A5 C5 G5 C5/D5 Pigpen was a dusty dude who couldn't keep his own ass clean (Ah-oh) A5 C5 G5 All the teachers said "Wa wa wa wa wa wa" - what does that shit mean? F5 E5 G Well, watch out, 'cause here they come... PEANUTS! CHORUS 2: C5/D5 A5 C5 G5 D5 A5 C5 G5 e|-------------------------------|-----------------------------| B|-------------------------------|-----------------------------| G|--5/7-77----------5-55---------|-7-77----------5-55----------| D|--5/7-77--777777--5-55--555555-|-7-77--777777--5-55--555555--| A|--3/5-55--777777--3-33--555555-|-5-55--777777--3-33--555555--| E|----------555555--------333333-|-------555555--------333333--| D5 A5 C5 G5 D5 A5 C5 G5 e|-----------------------------|----------------------------------------------------| B|-----------------------------|----------------------------------------------------| G|--7-77----------5-55---------|-7-77----------5-55---------------------------------| D|--7-77--777777--5-55--555555-|-7-77--777777--5-55--5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5--| A|--5-55--777777--3-33--555555-|-5-55--777777--3-33--5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5--| E|--5-55--555555--3-33--333333-|-5-55--555555--3-33--3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3--| C5/D5 A5 C5 G5 Oh Peanuts! Crazy Peanuts! D5 A5 C5 G5 Coming from The School of Hard Knocks D5 A5 C5 G5 Life's not always bowls of candy D5 A5 C5 G5 Sometimes you only get a bag of rocks BRIDGE: C5/D5 e|-------x--------x--------x--------x--------x--------x--------| B|-------x--------x--------x--------x--------x--------x--------| G|--5/7--x--xxxx--x--xxxx--x--xxxx--x--xxxx--x--xxxx--x--xxxx--| D|--5/7--x--xxxx--x--xxxx--x--xxxx--x--xxxx--x--xxxx--x--xxxx--| A|--3/5--x--xxxx--x--xxxx--x--xxxx--x--xxxx--x--xxxx--x--xxxx--| E|-------x--xxxx--x--xxxx--x--xxxx--x--xxxx--x--xxxx--x--xxxx--| C5/D5 A5 C5 G5 e|------------------------------------------| B|------------------------------------------| G|--5/7-7--xxxx-------xxxx--5-5--xxxx-------| D|--5/7-7--xxxx--7-7--xxxx--5-5--xxxx--5-5--| (x2) A|--3/5-5--xxxx--7-7--xxxx--3-3--xxxx--5-5--| E|---------xxxx--5-5--xxxx-------xxxx--3-3--| F5 E5 G e|----------------------------3-3--| B|----------------------------0-0--| G|----------------------------0-0--| D|--3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3--2-2-2-2--0-0--| A|--3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3--2-2-2-2--2-2--| E|--1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1--0-0-0-0--3-3--| C5/D5 (Ah-oh) Lucy was a psychiatrist but her comments always gave offence (Ah-oh) N/C And the bitch couldn't make no money, 'cause she charged a motherfucker five cents C5/D5 A5 C5 G5 C5/D5 (Ah-oh) You know the ladies love some Schroeder 'cause he played the '88s real good (Ah-oh) A5 C5 G5 And Franklin was a real cool cat, but the only brother in that hood F5 E5 G Well, watch out, 'cause here they come... PEANUTS! CHORUS 3: C5/D5 A5 C5 G5 e|--------------------------------| B|--------------------------------| G|--5/7-77----------5-55----------| D|--5/7-77--777777--5-55--555555--| A|--3/5-55--777777--3-33--555555--| E|----------555555--------333333--| D5 A5 C5 G5 e|------------------------------| B|------------------------------| G|--7-77----------5-55----------| D|--7-77--777777--5-55--555555--| (x3) A|--5-55--777777--3-33--555555--| E|--------555555--------333333--| C5/D5 A5 C5 G5 Oh Peanuts! Crazy Peanuts! D5 A5 C5 G5 Poor Charlie Brown, you will never get laid D5 A5 C5 G5 It's so hard to get pussy D5 A5 C5 G5 When you're the baldest kid in 2nd grade OUTRO: D5 A5 C5 G5 e|------------------------------| B|------------------------------| G|--7-77----------5-55----------| D|--7-77--777777--5-55--555555--| (x3) A|--5-55--777777--3-33--555555--| E|--------555555--------333333--| D5 A5 C5 G5 C5/D5 e|-------------------------------------------------------------| B|-------------------------------------------------------------| G|--7-77----------5-55---------------------------------5/7-----| D|--7-77--777777--5-55--5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5--5/7-----| A|--5-55--777777--3-33--5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5-5--3/5-1--| E|--------555555--------3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3-3----------| C5/D5 A5 C5 G5 Oh Peanuts! Crazy Peanuts! D5 A5 C5 G5 A bunch of kids trying to be free D5 A5 C5 G5 Take my hand and let's dance now D5 A5 C5 G5 C5/D5 Under Charlie's shitty Christmas Tree... xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx 5. 3 B a l l o o n s xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Tabbed by Jordan Lapping Tuning: E (Standard) CHORDS USED: A Asus4 Gsus2 Bm D Dsus2 Dsus2/F G e]---0-----0-----0-----2-----2-----0-----2-----3---| B]---2-----3-----3-----3-----3-----3-----3-----3---| G]---2-----2-----2-----4-----2-----2-----2-----0---| D]---2-----2-----0-----4-----0-----0-----0-----0---| A]---0-----0-----0-----2-----------------0-----2---| E]---------------3-----------------------1-----3---| INTRO: Dsus2 Dsus2/F Gsus2 Asus4 A e]--0-0-0-00--0-0-0-00--0-0-0-00--xxxxxx-x--| B]--3-3-3-33--3-3-3-33--3-3-3-33--333333p2--| G]--2-2-2-22--2-2-2-22--2-2-2-22--222222-2--| D]--0-0-0-00--0-0-0-00--0-0-0-00--222222-2--| (x2) A]------------0-0-0-00--0-0-0-00--000000-0--| E]------------1-1-1-11--3-3-3-33------------| D e]--2-2222222-2-2222222--| B]--3-3333333-3-3333333--| G]--2-2222222-2-2222222--| D]--0-0000000-0-0000000--| A]-----------------------| E]-----------------------| VERSE 1: Bm G D A e]--2-2222222--3-33333333--2-2222222--0-00000000--| B]--3-3333333--0-00000000--3-3333333--2-22222222--| G]--4-4444444--0-00000000--2-2222222--2-22222222--| D]--4-4444444--0-00000000--0-0000000--2-22222222--| (x2) A]--2-2222222--2-22222222-------------0-00000000--| E]-------------3-33333333-------------------------| Bm G I call you from my car to say I'll be there in a while D A A short plane ride and I will get to see your pretty smile Bm G Nothing on the radio - I fiddle with the dial D A Then I see a sign - the airport's just another mile PRE-CHORUS 1: Bm G D A e]--2-222--3-333--2-222--0-000--| B]--3-333--0-000--3-333--2-222--| G]--4-444--0-000--2-222--2-222--| D]--4-444--0-000--0-000--2-222--| A]--2-222--2-222---------0-000--| E]---------3-333----------------| Bm G D A e]--2-222--3-333--2-222--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0--xxxxxx--| B]--3-333--0-000--3-333--2-2-2-2-2-2h3-3p2-2-2-2-2--xxxxxx--| G]--4-444--0-000--2-222--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2--xxxxxx--| D]--4-444--0-000--0-000--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2--xxxxxx--| A]--2-222--2-222---------0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0--xxxxxx--| E]---------3-333--------------------------------------------| Bm G D A I check my bags and think about how much I hate to fly Bm G D A And as I near security, I almost start to cry... CHORUS 1: D G A e]--2-222--33333--0-000000--| B]--3-333--33333--2-222222--| G]--2-222--00000--2-222222--| D]--0-000--00000--2-222222--| (x3) A]---------22222--0-000000--| E]---------33333------------| D G A Asus4 A e]--2-222--33333--0-00000-0000-000000000--| B]--3-333--33333--2-22222h3333p222222222--| G]--2-222--00000--2-22222-2222-222222222--| D]--0-000--00000--2-22222-2222-222222222--| A]---------22222--0-00000-0000-000000000--| E]---------33333--------------------------| D G A Well, I hope the Law Enforcement agents can't tell from my face D G A I got three balloons of coke in an uncomfortable place D G A I'm sweating and I'm nervous, and I need a little air D G A Asus4 'Cause with four balloons of heroine, it's getting crowded up in there... A Crowded up in there... TRANSITION 1: Dsus2 Dsus2/F Gsus2 Asus4 A e]--0-0-0-00--0-0-0-00--0-0-0-00--xxxxxx-x--| B]--3-3-3-33--3-3-3-33--3-3-3-33--333333p2--| G]--2-2-2-22--2-2-2-22--2-2-2-22--222222-2--| D]--0-0-0-00--0-0-0-00--0-0-0-00--222222-2--| A]------------0-0-0-00--0-0-0-00--000000-0--| E]------------1-1-1-11--3-3-3-33------------| Dsus2 Dsus2/F Gsus2 Asus4 A e]--0-0-0-00--0-0-0-00--0-0-0-00--x----x--| B]--3-3-3-33--3-3-3-33--3-3-3-33--3~---2--| G]--2-2-2-22--2-2-2-22--2-2-2-22--2~---2--| D]--0-0-0-00--0-0-0-00--0-0-0-00--2~---2--| A]------------0-0-0-00--0-0-0-00--0----0--| E]------------1-1-1-11--3-3-3-33----------| VERSE 2: Bm G D A e]--2-2222222--3-33333333--2-2222222--0-00000000--| B]--3-3333333--0-00000000--3-3333333--2-22222222--| G]--4-4444444--0-00000000--2-2222222--2-22222222--| D]--4-4444444--0-00000000--0-0000000--2-22222222--| (x2) A]--2-2222222--2-22222222-------------0-00000000--| E]-------------3-33333333-------------------------| Bm G My mind is all a-jumble and my blood is cold as ice D A I dread the thought of having to unload this merchandise Bm G "Relax", I say, "It's not so bad - it might feel kind of nice" D A "Besides, who hasn't had a finger up there once or twice?" PRE-CHORUS 2: Bm G D A e]--2-222--3-333--2-222--0-000--| B]--3-333--0-000--3-333--2-222--| G]--4-444--0-000--2-222--2-222--| D]--4-444--0-000--0-000--2-222--| A]--2-222--2-222---------0-000--| E]---------3-333----------------| Bm G D A e]--2-222--3-333--2-222--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0--xxxxxx--| B]--3-333--0-000--3-333--2-2-2-2-2-2h3-3p2-2-2-2-2--xxxxxx--| G]--4-444--0-000--2-222--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2--xxxxxx--| D]--4-444--0-000--0-000--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2--xxxxxx--| A]--2-222--2-222---------0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0--xxxxxx--| E]---------3-333--------------------------------------------| Bm G D A I must remember - don't leave any drugs inside the host Bm G D A I did that once and a girl who tossed my salad overdosed CHORUS 2: D G A e]--2-222--33333--0-000000--| B]--3-333--33333--2-222222--| G]--2-222--00000--2-222222--| D]--0-000--00000--2-222222--| (x3) A]---------22222--0-000000--| E]---------33333------------| D G A Asus4 A e]--2-222--33333--0-00000-0000-000000000--| B]--3-333--33333--2-22222h3333p222222222--| G]--2-222--00000--2-22222-2222-222222222--| D]--0-000--00000--2-22222-2222-222222222--| A]---------22222--0-00000-0000-000000000--| E]---------33333--------------------------| D G A Well, I say a little prayer - Hail Maria, Full of Grace D G A I've got three balloons of coke in an uncomfortable place D G A I'm sweating and I'm nervous, and I need a little air D G A Asus4 And I swear Iím farting lines of blow into my underwear... A From the darriere... PRE-BRIDGE: Dsus2 Dsus2/F Gsus2 Asus4 A e]--0-0-0-00--0-0-0-00--0-0-0-00--xxxxxx-x--| B]--3-3-3-33--3-3-3-33--3-3-3-33--333333p2--| G]--2-2-2-22--2-2-2-22--2-2-2-22--222222-2--| D]--0-0-0-00--0-0-0-00--0-0-0-00--222222-2--| (x3) A]------------0-0-0-00--0-0-0-00--000000-0--| E]------------1-1-1-11--3-3-3-33------------| Dsus2 Dsus2/F Gsus2 Asus4 A e]--0-0-0-00--0-0-0-00--0-0-0-00--x----x--| B]--3-3-3-33--3-3-3-33--3-3-3-33--3~---2--| G]--2-2-2-22--2-2-2-22--2-2-2-22--2~---2--| D]--0-0-0-00--0-0-0-00--0-0-0-00--2~---2--| A]------------0-0-0-00--0-0-0-00--0----0--| E]------------1-1-1-11--3-3-3-33----------| BRIDGE: Bm G D A e]--2-2222222--3-3333333--2-2222222--0-00000000--| B]--3-3333333--0-0000000--3-3333333--2-22222222--| G]--4-4444444--0-0000000--2-2222222--2-22222222--| D]--4-4444444--0-0000000--0-0000000--2-22222222--| A]--2-2222222--2-2222222-------------0-00000000--| E]-------------3-3333333-------------------------| Bm G D A Asus4 A e]--2-2222222--3-3333333--2-2222222--0-00000-0-000-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0--| B]--3-3333333--0-0000000--3-3333333--2-22222h3p222-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2--| G]--4-4444444--0-0000000--2-2222222--2-22222-2-222-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2--| D]--4-4444444--0-0000000--0-0000000--2-22222-2-222-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2--| A]--2-2222222--2-2222222-------------0-00000-0-000-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0--| E]-------------3-3333333--------------------------------------------| Bm G I was a little eager when I loaded up my stash D A Five balloons of extasy, and six balloons of hash Bm G Eight balloons of L.S.D., and nine of sensi mild D A Asus4 A A box of Chinese fireworks, Guatemalan child... PRE-CHORUS 3: Bm G D A e]--2-222--3-333--2-222--0-000--| B]--3-333--0-000--3-333--2-222--| G]--4-444--0-000--2-222--2-222--| D]--4-444--0-000--0-000--2-222--| A]--2-222--2-222---------0-000--| E]---------3-333----------------| Bm G D A e]--2-222--3-333--2-222--0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0--xxxxxx--| B]--3-333--0-000--3-333--2-2-2-2-2-2h3-3p2-2-2-2-2--xxxxxx--| G]--4-444--0-000--2-222--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2--xxxxxx--| D]--4-444--0-000--0-000--2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2--xxxxxx--| A]--2-222--2-222---------0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0--xxxxxx--| E]---------3-333--------------------------------------------| Bm G D A I've made it to the gate now and my joy I can't contain Bm G D A I board the aircraft; take my seat in the cockpit of the plane... CHORUS 3: D G A e]--22222--33333--00000000--| B]--33333--33333--22222222--| G]--22222--00000--22222222--| D]--00000--00000--22222222--| (x3) A]---------22222--00000000--| E]---------33333------------| D G A Asus4 A e]--22222--33333--0000000-0000-000000000--| B]--33333--33333--2222222h3333p222222222--| G]--22222--00000--2222222-2222-222222222--| D]--00000--00000--2222222-2222-222222222--| A]---------22222--0000000-0000-000000000--| E]---------33333--------------------------| D G A As I taxi down the runway, I get a smile on my face D G A I've got three balloons of coke in an uncomfortable place D G A "Flight Crew, prepare for take-off as I lift us in the air" D G A Asus4 And by the way, does anyone want to buy a Guatemalan child... A From my darriere? OUTRO: Dsus2 Dsus2/F Gsus2 Asus4 A e]--0-0-0-00--0-0-0-00--0-0-0-00--xxxxxx-x--| B]--3-3-3-33--3-3-3-33--3-3-3-33--333333p2--| G]--2-2-2-22--2-2-2-22--2-2-2-22--222222-2--| D]--0-0-0-00--0-0-0-00--0-0-0-00--222222-2--| (x3) A]------------0-0-0-00--0-0-0-00--000000-0--| E]------------1-1-1-11--3-3-3-33------------| Dsus2 Dsus2/F Gsus2 Asus4 A D e]--0-0-0-00--0-0-0-00--0-0-0-00--xxx--xxx--2~~~--| B]--3-3-3-33--3-3-3-33--3-3-3-33--333--222--3~~~--| G]--2-2-2-22--2-2-2-22--2-2-2-22--222--222--2~~~--| D]--0-0-0-00--0-0-0-00--0-0-0-00--222--222--0~~~--| A]------------0-0-0-00--0-0-0-00--000--000--------| E]------------1-1-1-11--3-3-3-33------------------| xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx 6. D e a r D i a r y 2 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Tabbed by Jordan Lapping Tuning: E (Standard) CHORDS USED: Am C Cmaj9 Em F G e]---0----0----0----0----1----3---| B]---1----1----1----0----1----0---| G]---2----0----0----0----2----0---| D]---2----2----0----2----3----0---| A]---0----3----2----2----3----2---| E]------------------0----1----3---| INTRO: C Em e]--------------------------0~--------| B]------------------------0----0------| G]-----0-----0-----0----0--------0----| D]-------0h2---0h2-----------------2--| (x2) A]--3~--------------------------------| E]--------------------0---------------| VERSE: C Em e]--------0~-------------0~--------| B]------1----1---------0----0------| G]----0--------0-----0--------0----| D]---------------2--------------2--| (x4) A]--3------------------------------| E]-----------------0---------------| F G C Cmaj9 Am F G e]--------1~-------------3~-------|-------0--------0--------0~-------|-------1~----------3--| B]------1----1---------0----0-----|-----1--------1--------1----1-----|-----1----1--------0--| G]----2--------2-----0--------0---|---0--------0--------2--------2---|---2--------2------0--| D]---------------3--------------0-|--------------------------------2-|--------------3----0--| A]--------------------------------|-3--------2--------0--------------|-------------------2--| E]--1--------------3--------------|----------------------------------|-1---------------3-3--| C Em Dear Diary - today was a great day C Em I bought myself a brand new horse C Em Sheís strong and fast, and so very beautiful C Em And just a little wild, of course F G I know tomorrow I can tame her C Cmaj9 Am If I only believe F G Wish me luck Diary N/C Christopher Reeve OUTRO: C Em C e]--------------------------0~------------0~~~--| B]------------------------0----0---------1~~~---| G]-----0-----0-----0----0--------0------0~~~----| D]-------0h2---0h2-----------------2---2~~~-----| A]--3~--------------------------------3~~~------| E]--------------------0-------------------------| xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx 7. M e d i e v a l B u s h xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Tabbed by Jordan Lapping Tuning: E (Standard) CHORDS USED: Am C Dm e]---0----0----1---| B]---1----1----3---| G]---2----0----2---| D]---2----2----0---| A]---0----3--------| E]-----------------| INTRO: Am e]------------------------------------| B]----1-1-1---1-1-1----1-1-1---1-1-1--| G]----2-2-2---2-2-2----2-2-2---2-2-2--| D]----2-2-2---2-2-2----2-2-2---2-2-2--| A]--0-------0--------0-------0--------| E]------------------------------------| Am E Am e]---------------------------------------------------------------------| B]----1-1-1---1-1-1----0-0-0---0-0-0---0-0-0---0-0-0----1-1-1---1-1-1--| G]----2-2-2---2-2-2----1-1-1---1-1-1---1-1-1---1-1-1----2-2-2---2-2-2--| D]----2-2-2---2-2-2----2-2-2---2-2-2---2-2-2---2-2-2----2-2-2---2-2-2--| A]--0-------0-----------------------------------------0-------0--------| E]-------------------0-------0-------0-------0-------------------------| Dm Am E Am e]----1-1-1---1-1-1-----------------------------------|-----------------------------------| B]----3-3-3---3-3-3----1-1-1---1-1-1----0-0-0---0-0-0-|---1-1-1---1-1-1----1-1-1---1-1-1--| G]----2-2-2---2-2-2----2-2-2---2-2-2----1-1-1---1-1-1-|---2-2-2---2-2-2----2-2-2---2-2-2--| D]--0-------0----------2-2-2---2-2-2----2-2-2---2-2-2-|---2-2-2---2-2-2----2-2-2---2-2-2--| A]-------------------0-------0------------------------|-0-------0--------0-------0--------| E]------------------------------------0-------0-------|-----------------------------------| VERSE 1: Am E Am e]---------------------------------------------------------------------| B]----1-1-1---1-1-1----0-0-0---0-0-0---0-0-0---0-0-0----1-1-1---1-1-1--| G]----2-2-2---2-2-2----1-1-1---1-1-1---1-1-1---1-1-1----2-2-2---2-2-2--| D]----2-2-2---2-2-2----2-2-2---2-2-2---2-2-2---2-2-2----2-2-2---2-2-2--| A]--0-------0-----------------------------------------0-------0--------| E]-------------------0-------0-------0-------0-------------------------| Dm Am E Am e]----1-1-1---1-1-1-----------------------------------------------------| B]----3-3-3---3-3-3----1-1-1---1-1-1----0-0-0---0-0-0----1-1-1---1-1-1--| G]----2-2-2---2-2-2----2-2-2---2-2-2----1-1-1---1-1-1----2-2-2---2-2-2--| D]--0-------0----------2-2-2---2-2-2----2-2-2---2-2-2----2-2-2---2-2-2--| A]-------------------0-------0-------------------------0-------0--------| E]------------------------------------0-------0-------------------------| Am E Come fair lady, to mine bed we go Am And, verily sweet pleasures we shall know Dm Am Yet, where thy belly meets thy limb E I beseech thee give a trim Am For thy bush doth overflow TRANSITION 1: Am e]------------------------------------| B]----1-1-1---1-1-1----1-1-1---1-1-1--| G]----2-2-2---2-2-2----2-2-2---2-2-2--| D]----2-2-2---2-2-2----2-2-2---2-2-2--| A]--0-------0--------0-------0--------| E]------------------------------------| "Milady doth have a '70s muff - a 1470s muff!" VERSE 2: Am E Am e]---------------------------------------------------------------------| B]----1-1-1---1-1-1----0-0-0---0-0-0---0-0-0---0-0-0----1-1-1---1-1-1--| G]----2-2-2---2-2-2----1-1-1---1-1-1---1-1-1---1-1-1----2-2-2---2-2-2--| D]----2-2-2---2-2-2----2-2-2---2-2-2---2-2-2---2-2-2----2-2-2---2-2-2--| A]--0-------0-----------------------------------------0-------0--------| E]-------------------0-------0-------0-------0-------------------------| Dm Am E Am e]----1-1-1---1-1-1-----------------------------------------------------| B]----3-3-3---3-3-3----1-1-1---1-1-1----0-0-0---0-0-0----1-1-1---1-1-1--| G]----2-2-2---2-2-2----2-2-2---2-2-2----1-1-1---1-1-1----2-2-2---2-2-2--| D]--0-------0----------2-2-2---2-2-2----2-2-2---2-2-2----2-2-2---2-2-2--| A]-------------------0-------0-------------------------0-------0--------| E]------------------------------------0-------0-------------------------| Am E Zounds! It's as prickly as a Christmas wreath Am Think it might hide some babybirds beneath Dm Am Pray, shave it off to make a coat E There are fur balls down my throat Am Short and curlies twixt my teeth TRANSITION 2: Am e]------------------------------------| B]----1-1-1---1-1-1----1-1-1---1-1-1--| G]----2-2-2---2-2-2----2-2-2---2-2-2--| D]----2-2-2---2-2-2----2-2-2---2-2-2--| A]--0-------0--------0-------0--------| E]------------------------------------| "I sayeth not thy vagina is hairsute, but it looketh like thou hast Buckwheat in a leg-lock!" VERSE 3: Am E Am e]---------------------------------------------------------------------| B]----1-1-1---1-1-1----0-0-0---0-0-0---0-0-0---0-0-0----1-1-1---1-1-1--| G]----2-2-2---2-2-2----1-1-1---1-1-1---1-1-1---1-1-1----2-2-2---2-2-2--| D]----2-2-2---2-2-2----2-2-2---2-2-2---2-2-2---2-2-2----2-2-2---2-2-2--| A]--0-------0-----------------------------------------0-------0--------| E]-------------------0-------0-------0-------0-------------------------| Dm Am E Am e]----1-1-1---1-1-1-----------------------------------------------------| B]----3-3-3---3-3-3----1-1-1---1-1-1----0-0-0---0-0-0----1-1-1---1-1-1--| G]----2-2-2---2-2-2----2-2-2---2-2-2----1-1-1---1-1-1----2-2-2---2-2-2--| D]--0-------0----------2-2-2---2-2-2----2-2-2---2-2-2----2-2-2---2-2-2--| A]-------------------0-------0-------------------------0-------0--------| E]------------------------------------0-------0-------------------------| Am E But soft! What hair through yonder girdle grows Am To be, or not to be put in cornrows... Dm Am O! it is beastly and unruly E And it smelleth of patchouli Am And that offends my nose TRANSITION 3: Am e]--------------------------------------------| B]----1-1-1---1-1-1----1-1-1---1-1-1---1-1-1--| G]----2-2-2---2-2-2----2-2-2---2-2-2---2-2-2--| D]----2-2-2---2-2-2----2-2-2---2-2-2---2-2-2--| A]--0-------0--------0-------0-------0--------| E]--------------------------------------------| "I sayeth not thou art fury down there, but it doth resemble Fidel Castro

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